Speckles n Spectrum

back to basics seemingly-banal adventures of an eclectic modern muser...

"Learning from the Past, Hopes for the Future, and a Life's Journey of making the most of what's at hand."


I'm sick, lurv sick that is. You know those rare days that I get this virus. My friend has contaminated me with this disease after posting a sort of luv letter or regretful stat on fb. But then to be honest I've been feeling this for a while now, at least for a week I think.

The day I've worn my fave purple dress (thank God it still fits, surprisingly it stretch out). These past few days I'm feeling romantic for no one in particular. I actually got those days as I said rarely maybe once a year but for now it's been too long. My gawd one week almost and I'm writing this way now haha, figured it's really not fitting for me to feel that way. I am ruining my hardcore persona, duh!

I seldom write about romantic love and cheesiness. I'm not a guru in the subject, in fact this is my waterloo. I know how to love but I think I've never experienced it the real way. I'm kinda more difficult to deal with when it comes to romantic love rather than being all out for family and friends. I'm more always on guard and defensive about this. I had boyfriends and I never talk about it. I'm not kiss and tell. I got flings and maybe I consider them all flings... tadaa... boom! Yeah, a romantic confession, darn hope no one gets to read this but then if you happened to please let me know how airhead I am OH-kay?

I can just imagine right now the face of my sister when we were on skype video chatting with a friend I met from the dating site.

He asked me "How many partners you had?"

My sister said straight away, "She never had a boyfriend."

And I answered the question addressing both of them, "I can still count using a single hand."

She never said anything about it but by the looked on her face I knew her thoughts are between "you're bluffing, right?" or she wanted to ask, "really, ate nagkaboyfriend ka na?"

Haha... I can't help but smile thinking about the way she reacted.

That's why I always say I am secretive, very secretive but not anymore. I'm learning to let it out especially the romantic things. I hope I learn and get the feel that there's nothing to be ashamed of being in love.

Why is it I felt that way about it in the first place? Don't ask, I guess I got that bad idea while growing up. Now I know being a flirt isn't a mortal sin, it's part of life, it's part of nature, it's like the way how the butterflies flirt with the flowers for pollen grains but still I've a long way to learn the art of flirting and still knowing me I won't even bother to learn.

That's why good luck to the so called luv life and hope in my few hazy dazy romantic fool episodes I'll meet the one who'll sing this for me...

... and maybe help me consider signing the divorce papers with myself 
or join in the threesome =)

We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, 
and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, 
we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.  
~Author Unknown

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